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Welcome to the Rofling Officer Productions blog, where you will mainly find extremely cynical reviews by a British Stereotype (usually with my good friend, John Smith). These reviews will most often be of games and films, but also have a few little projects.

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Friday, 15 April 2011

General Harry Potter Series Review

I've always liked Harry Potter, however when the Deathy Hallows pt 1 was released I was extremely sceptical, like a practising Jewish Israeli who is about to enter Saudi Arabia with a hangover. The reason you ask?

Well, I read the Harry Potter books a lot when I was a kid, and also went to see the films. They were great, and I still like them even to this day. What I appreciate today is the fact that the series gets darker and darker as it goes on, it builds up suspense for the final film. The forth film was my favourite, very dark, but also very good, a bit like the Dark Knight, just not as good. And then... you go the fifth. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

Here's a representation of what the script meeting must have been like with the new shitty director: "Hey, guys I just had a great idea! I know I'm the new guy but hear me out! Right, you know that awesome building darkness that my predesessors had in the movies? Right well fuck that, let's just take it back to square one and have it as light hearted and puke-worthy as a child comedy about liberal rabbits and flowers!"

Yes, the moment this dick head joined, everything went downhill. The characters tried some sickening attempts at comedy, all the fairly important backstories in the book were not so much ignored as they were draped in a big black bag in the bin bag factory to fend for themselves. And all the backstories they catered to ended up being so rushed it was like they had a flight leaving in half an hour and they had to get a taxi in New York.

And if that film was shit the Half Blood Prince was even worse. It wasn't so much about Harry vs. Voldemort as it was Harry Potter Kids vs. relationships. Thinking back, I can't even think of a way to describe the plot of this film. I hated every part of it, even the ending, which was the best part of the book. It falls completely flat because a) This was very dark, but since they abandoned anything remotely dark in the last film then this was like jumping over a coffee table to find your next obstacle is Godzilla, and b) THERE WAS NO BATTLE. In the battle one character is supposed to be bitten by a werewolf, but this is ruined because the werewolf is given an introduction in almost whisper form, and the other character isn't introduced at all, which means they have to throw in some horse shit in the next film that wraps that up, ALSO IN WHISPER FORM.

Now onto the Deathly Hallows pt 1. I was not in a good mood when I went to watch it. I had been disappointed so much by the last two films I had no desire to watch this guaranteed pile of shit. But I had promised someone I'd go and see it with them, and I did.

I liked it. Quite a lot. It was no where near as good as it could have been, you know, if they kept the suspensful darkness going, but with whatever tatters of the old suspense that had left, I enjoyed it. Sure the idiot director realised he missed out on introducing, reintroducing, and developing crucial characters so they can be ready for their part in the fucking movie, but Harry Potter was back to what it was supposed to be: Harry fighting Voldemort.

*SPOILER ALERT*

Speaking of bringing back characters so quickly and carelessly it was as if coffee exploded out of their mouths on the first day of filming after settling down to read the book, only to find out they were missing 10 crucial characters; the Dobby death scene was completely ruined for me. Why? I didn't really give a shit about him. It had been 5 films since we had last see him, since all the directors seemed to want to keep him out of the film like he'd been smoking weed on set or something. Dobby was just thrown in there, and since I was expecting him to just be forgotten again I wasn't expecting it, it was around this time I began to really enjoy myself. But I was disappointed, after being brought back he disappears again until right at the end of the film when he dies.

Some people in the cinema I was in cried at this scene, I personally felt like crying for him would be like crying for an old pen pal who you lost contact with ages ago, only to receive a letter in the post saying he's died.

To wrap up the review, would I reccomend this film? Maybe. I would reccomend you watch it like this: watch films 1-4, then miss out films 5 and 6 and read the books instead. Then watch the Deathly Hallows pt 1.

Yeah, it was a good film that I enjoyed from start to finish. Fingers crossed they won't fuck up part 2.

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